Wednesday, July 12, 2006

 

The Fashion Police Make Another Arrest

So I'm minding my own business and hanging out at the beach with my daughter when this red critter walks into my line of vision. Boing! After recovering from shock, I thought here it is: Fashion Police Time! I fished my digital camera out of my beach bag (near the bottom-- note to myself: keep it close to the top!). I had only seconds before this vision in red hustled on down the beach. I cropped the photo so you can more easily discern what we on the beach viewed that day and also to remove the head of this fashion victim. In cropping and zooming, I noticed the swimmer in the ocean eyeballing him--I wonder if she had nightmares later?

Let me use words to better describe what the shaded photo only teases: the man was wearing a bright red two-piece outfit. The bikini bottoms were riding WAY high up on the ass. On his back, he was wearing an enormous backpack. The fashion statement he was making obviously had to do with color coordination as his tattoes were all in red! Yes, you read that right: red!

Today my snarky Maui Fashion Police Panel are going to weigh in:

WYM: This man needs a lot of attention...he is screaming "Look at me! I'm as hot as a Fourth of July firecracker. If you light the fuse on my backpack, I'll take off like a rocket."

BB: I downed a Bloodymary this morning for my hangover. This man could have saved me calories if he had meandered along earlier. Seriously (what a joke!) this man is flaunting his ass-ets, non?

TAOLAD: The summertime heat on Maui has been fierce, and this eccentric man has decided to color coordinate with the fire of our Maui summer. What's in his backpack I wonder--could it be a cleverly disguised cooler?

Aquamarine: I'm not much of a red person as you can clue-in on by my name. However, if you are going to do red, why not go ALL the way? Obviously some trauma has pushed this man to expressing himself. I would love a close-up to see what his tattoes are...wouldn't you?
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