Monday, November 08, 2004

 
There is currently a severe geomagnetic storm happening worldwide, but I swear that it must be concentrated right here in Maui. This is one reason to account for the argumentative, aggressive nature of our house guest. Another possibility is this: a smart blond is something D. can't quite fathom. D. has become quite insufferable with his inability to let the subject of a word definition drop, primarily because he was proven wrong and this wouldn't do for his ego.

The night began with a lovely dinner at a fine restaurant in Wailea with Bob, myself, and our two houseguests...dinner on us, as usual. During the course of dinner, D. mentioned the final scene of a television show that we all watched last evening on television, Boston Legal. The final scene showed the talented James Spader who is a lawyer in the tv show in bed with a woman that D. wrongly assumed to be the wife of a politician in the script. I corrected him. Big mistake on my part, or maybe not. Were it not for correcting him and informing him that it was a fellow lady lawyer, I might not have discovered his argumentative, hostile nature. He immediately bet me a million dollars, and I said you're on. Of course, neither of us has a million dollars, but I know that I have access to more money than he does as he is quite broke and desperate right now, and that is why he is sleeping on our couch and not in an expensive hotel room.

Next he wanted to challenge me on the definition of the word flakey. I don't know why. I told him that I understood it to mean someone that is unreliable. He said, no, you are quite wrong. It refers to a baseball person who is left handed. And then I diplomatically stated that I had never heard that definition, but since he is a learned man, then it might be so. This is when D. became obsessive. He stated categorically that his definition was correct, and that I was so very wrong. I told him when we got home, we would settle the matter by looking up contemporary word definitions on google. I called my daughter on my cellphone for him to hear what she saw as the final scene of the television show as she had watched the show with us, and I put her on the phone with him. She told him exactly what I had told him, plus she gave the same definition of the word flakey as I had.

This was when D. went off the semi-deep end and became infuriated. He wouldn't stop discussing this stupid definition all the way home, and upon arriving home began harrassing me to prove the definition of the word to him by showing it to him on the computer. He sat down on the couch, and all the while I was searching for a contemporary dictionary on the net, he kept slinging nasty comments at me about how wrong I was. I didn't let him unbalance me, but I did find it rather interesting to observe that both Bob and his ex each escaped away from D. in separate directions. I was stuck dealing with this old fart bugging me in my home about a word definition.
No matter how many definitions I brought up on the screen that proved I was right, he wouldn't accept any of them. He then tried to taunt me by calling me flakey.

If this was my friend (which it is not) or my houseguest (which it is not), I would have found a way to guide him directly to the door and bid him goodnight. Unfortunately, this is Bob's ex wife's husband who has made himself quite comfortable in our home,and I can't kick his ass out on the street because Bob won't allow it. Thus, I am going to have to draft a plan to deal with D. as they still have three more days here. Since he can not concede defeat, I don't care to argue any more with this obnoxious old coot who is a poor loser with a bad memory and not up to date on modern word usage. Since Bob won't come to my defense and my daughter will, I will let Genvieve calm his magnetic malfunctioning mind with her charm. If this doesn't work, he and his ex may have to find themselves a hotel. I will put up a sign near the front door that states: Mooches Enter At Your Own Peril.
He most likely understands this word mooch. I would bet on it.
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